Posted by: 94stranger | December 5, 2008

Poem: Crystal Rain

Ever the one dawn breaking

on the wild wide isles of clay,

lighting the trains of making -

nor fear nor hate gainsay;

 

ever the bells that tinkled

through the mossy moons of fey

shall dance like the sweet-rose bowers

where he leads her to play.

 

 

Never the light I sprinkled

down the long rivers of day

shall die in your limbs and flowers

till the breath blown away


Responses

  1. A rare lyrical touch 94

    They don’t teach this sort of thing anymore
    song long ago seperated, a surgical operation, cutting song away from poetry so you have poets who sing like a typewriter click click clickclick

    I hear Poe in this one

  2. Thank you Shadowshift.
    I’ve read very little poetry I have to confess, but that includes, in my youth, some Dylan Thomas. Thomas both wrote the kind of thing I imagined myself wanting to write, and did it so well that I was convinced he could not be surpassed or even equalled. I guess it took me the major part of my adult life to reach the point at which I felt that perhaps I could have a voice of my own as a poet. However, as you see I tend to veer all the time towards the language of Shakespeare and the King James bible. I was thinking the other day that perhaps that might also be due to a copy of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table which sang to me as a boy.
    I believe you’re right – the music is often entirely absent from modern poetry – in the end, finding your own voice means in part, I guess, reaching the point where you can say ’screw you’ to everything you don’t relate to, no matter how fashionable, and write what you feel inside, irrespective of the impact (or non-impact) it has on anyone else; not an easy thing to do. Since Dylan Thomas knocked the wind out of my sails, I’ve not ever fantasized about myself as a ‘Poet’, which I suppose makes it easier than for those whose poetic career is going to depend on the responses of their peers.

    This poem is a patchwork: the first two verses unhappily grafted onto the third: a surviving fragment of another which has been in my head for years. I just needed to get something on to paper – but I think at some point this will have to go to the forge to be melted down and re-cast.

  3. You continue to amaze me..this is beautiful.

    You have such a unique style. Have you lived in another lifetime?

  4. The mood of this poem is palpable and very enticing, at least for me, loved it :) !

  5. Hi 94, Somehow I’ve missed your response for two months. Oh well…

    I too use anachronistic styles but seldom feel that it’s a failure. I mix styles as I like just as if I’m preparing a meal and using the spices I like. I’ve gotten sidetracked by many things lately and haven’t even written light verse lately, but a couple of years ago I wrote some good gothic verses, drenched in, alternately, Elizabethan (Shakespearean) language and romantic and gothic imagery of later periods, including Victorian.

    I do not believe that you have to stick with one period if you do an imitative or derivative work. It’s like saying you have to speak one language, or only one language per conversation perhaps. Parochial ideas.

    On the other hand there are (supposedly, I’m not sure) in every generation creators of new forms that break away from old forms and show the way to different avenues where many can follow. I don’t think I’ve done anything innovative in this sense in my work. A scholarly analysis would probably reveal all my sources and show nothing was new.

    Here’s one of what I consider my best pieces of poetry. It is lyrical verse and does not follow rules of logic other than it must evoke moods, and move emotions. It does this with sounds and images. Like yours above it was made by merging more than one smaller piece, in this case about five different ones.

    Moonchild Part I http://moonchild2.wordpress.com/2008/09/14/moonchild-part-i/

  6. Hi Shadowolf,
    I paid you a visit! Please excuse my inefficiency as a correspondent – I am going through a fallow period in that regard at the moment, nor have I written any poetry for some time: perhaps I’m hibernating.

  7. Hey 94,

    I’m sorry my last message meant I had missed seeing your last message for two months. Because I hadn’t checked my global comments and didn’t know it was there. I was apologizing and finally responding to that early December message of yours which was long and thoughtful.

    I too am not creating any new verse, and am instead focusing my energies on building various series of websites. Keep well.- James


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